Ainsley's Birth Story

Well, hello! I decided to take some time away from the blog during the weeks of Christmas and New Year's since I haven't had a spare minute to write a post. And I hate nothing more than just posting to post, ya know?

Today, I thought I'd kick off regular blogging again by sharing the little story of Ainsley's birthday. It was such a sweet and memorable day, and I'm more than happy to share it with you all.

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I'll start by saying, we didn't really know that we'd be having her on December 10th. We had a bag packed just in case, and my parents came up earlier that week because I just knew that my body wasn't going to hold Ainsley in much longer.  However, we had no guarantee that Wednesday would be the day. 

The morning of December 10th, I had my regular twice-weekly appointment, as well as my (regular, twice-weekly) non-stress test. Ainsley hadn't been moving as much the night before -- something I immediately reported to my O.B.'s nurse when she was getting my vitals. After the non-stress test, which showed heavy contractions, (I could have told them this without a non-stress test, ha!), Dr. D came in and "checked" me. 

After a few seconds, he announced I had progressed significantly and he said Ainsley would likely have arrived within the next 48 hours anyway. Since this was a repeat C-section and I was considered a high-risk pregnancy due to my heart history, we decided to get her out that night at 5:00 p.m. (Dr. D likes to deliver his own babies whenever possible, especially his high-risk patients.) So, he called Labor & Delivery and told them to admit us. 

Ten minutes later, a nurse came into the exam room with a wheelchair and up to Floor 5 we went...

Apparently, there was a mass exodus of babies from uteruses (uteri?) across Northwest Arkansas that day because EVERY SINGLE ROOM was occupied. So, they had us wait in the L&D family waiting room while a space opened up. An hour or so later, they called us back.

Because Labor & Delivery was hopping that day, they had to set us up in one of the doctors' on-call rooms, (where the docs sleep when they're on call.) It was the size of a shoebox and had no windows, which gave both of us a little anxiety, but I was so excited that we were meeting Ainsley, that I'd have stayed in that tiny room for a week!

Our sweet nurse Mary assured us that one of the birthing suites would be ready for us as soon as the surgery was over, which was great because....windows. #necessarythings

By that time, it was about noon and our five hour wait to meet Ainsley began.

The nurse started my IV, had me sign approximately 150 papers and change into the oh-so-chic hospital gown. 

Those five hours of waiting were amazing, though. Stephen and I had time to laugh and talk, watch some TV, make calls to some friends and family, and just enjoy each other's company. We also had ample time to really talk to our nurses, the anesthesiology team and our doctor for any last-minute questions. I mean it when I say, I've never been that calm about such a huge event. 

Around 3:30, the anesthesiologist came in to start my epidural. Just like last time, because of some issues surrounding my heart and blood pressure, a spinal wasn't a possibility. I was nervous about that and told him the story of what happened during Caroline's birth. I'll never forget what he said next:

Well, I'm running this show today and that won't happen again. I promise. Believe me?

I did. Fully. 

He told me that the reason (at least he thought) that the epi didn't work the last time was because they didn't give it enough time to kick in completely. So, he brought his little cart of needles in and the fun began...

I'll be honest, it hurt. Well, the numbing shot, anyway. The sensation of the epidural going in was just weird. Stephen was able to sit beside me and hold my hand, and my nurse held my shoulders and reminded me to breathe, ha! The entire thing took less than four minutes. The last epidural took 20 minutes to place. So yeah, it was already making out to be a better experience. 

After that, a nurse from the nursery came in to let me know who the on-call pediatrician would be, as well as find out what our birth plan was. Our hospital is amazingly respectful of mommas' wishes for those crucial moments right after the baby is born, whether it's a C-section or regular delivery. I LOVE that they ask even the C-section mommas how they'd like things to go. I told her that I wanted to hold Ainsley skin-to-skin ASAP in recovery, as well as let her nurse immediately. 

Around 4:40, Dr. D came in and handed Stephen a pair of scrubs to wear in the O.R. - it was go time!

Stephen and I gave each other a quick kiss and they wheeled me across the hall to the operating room. Until then, I hadn't been that nervous, but it hit me like a ton of bricks then. Thankfully, everyone was so sweet and reassuring, plus I could tell the epidural was really kicking in. 

After testing me to make sure I was completely numb, they let Stephen come in and the surgery was underway!

I felt a whoooooole lot of pulling and tugging - it was so weird. But strangely, nothing hurt. (Stephen told me later that night that he was shocked at how rough they have to be to get the baby out!) 

Just moments after they began, I heard Dr. D say, "Ready to meet her?"

Before I could answer yes, I heard a beautiful, mighty cry fill the room. 

It was Ainsley. 

My baby girl was born. 

I'm serious when I say, it was one of the most surreal moments of my life. 

They weighed her and announced that she weighed 5 lbs., 13 oz. - a tiny little thing with a big, healthy set of lungs! While they checked her out, they finished my surgery, which felt like it took forever. I was so ready to hold my girl!

Stephen joined me in recovery almost immediately and, just a few minutes later, they brought Ains in for some skin-to-skin bonding and breastfeeding. I couldn't get over how teeny and delicate she was! I just kept saying, "She's beautiful!"

We enjoyed a few quiet minutes with just the three of us before they took us to our room.

It was a perfect birth experience. 

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Soon thereafter, Stephen's mom brought Caroline into the room to meet Ainsley. She immediately smiled when she saw Ains, then started to whimper when she saw me. I think she was a little scared of all the tubes and machines in the room. After a few minutes though, she was totally fine. It was so neat to have our family of four all together!

The hospital stay was smooth and FAST. We really only spent a couple days there. (Wednesday evening, Thursday and a few hours on Friday morning.) Ainsley was nursing well, she passed all her newborn screenings with flying colors and I was recovering quickly. That Friday morning, they discharged us and we took our second baby girl home!

If you read all of that, props to you ; ) If you didn't, I can't say I blame you, ha! 

Thanks so much for indulging my momma-ness and letting me tell Ainsley's birth story. I treat this blog like a journal for our life, so I wanted to jot this down while it was still fresh. 

Confessional Friday: {Special Edition - Getting to Know You!}

I wanted this Friday to be all about getting to know each other. I've seen a lot of new faces around here lately and so I wanted to take a day to introduce all of you newcomers to the blog! I

If you aren't a blogger, have no fear! Just leave a comment below and let me know you're out there and reading! Feel free to leave a brief bio about yourself and what brought you here, as well. I love meeting new friends!

So, my name is Leslie and I've been the author of this blog since her creation in 2009. I'm also the founder of the original Confessional Friday link-up, which I started back in 2011! (Hence the reason we are here on this lovely Friday.)

I started this blog as an experiment for a company that I worked for back then. The company wanted to start a corporate blog, but my supervisor and I knew nothing about the world of blogging. So, I started one for myself to learn the ropes of content management and, low and behold, my new favorite hobby was born.

Five years later, I'm still here.

I'm married to my very best friend, Stephen. We got hitched in September 2011 and reside in Northwest Arkansas. We have a beautiful three-month-old baby girl named Caroline, born October 14, 2013. You can read her birth story here. Lastly, we are the proud owners of two dogs, Ruby, (the mini dachshund), and Ari, (the German Shepherd).

The morning of Caroline's birth, about two hours before we had her!

My first moments with this princess!

I graduated from Arkansas State University in 2007 with a B.A. in English. I moved to Northwest Arkansas for an internship in January 2008 and loved it so much that I never left. Now, I work part-time two days a week as a writer at a globally renowned public relations firm in Fayetteville and love, love, love my company. The other five days of the week, I'm a SAHM to my baby girl, which is my newest and proudest role yet.

Stephen is the Director of Sales for one of the largest nutrition companies in the U.S. He is in charge of bringing protein shakes, supplements, vitamins and protein bars to some of the biggest retailers in the world, one of which is located right here in Northwest Arkansas! (Hint: It was founded by a guy named Sam Walton ;-)

He was recently promoted and I am so proud of his hard work and dedication to his job. He is a great provider and one of the most intelligent people I've met. (Though he will probably tell you that he's not that smart, just full of hot air, ha!)

Little Red River - Heber Springs, AR

I grew up in a town called Heber Springs, AR, which is located in the central part of the state (my parents' barn and the river behind their house are pictured above.) We lived on a farm and, until I moved away for college, I'd never even lived on a paved road. I wouldn't have traded that childhood in the country for anything and, as a result, I can still swing over a barbed wire fence unscathed.

My mom is my bestie!

Mom and Dad on the lake

With his herd (or one member of it)!

My mom and dad have been married for over 30 years and I love them dearly. My mom is a retired hairdresser and my dad owns a heating and air conditioning business, while also farming cattle.

I have one sibling, my 21-year-old brother named Matthew. We have always been really close and I love the kid dearly. He is married to Lauren, one of the sweetest people I've met. You can see them in the photos above!

Stephen comes from a large Italian family. He grew up in Fort Smith, AR and graduated from the University of Arkansas in Fayetteville. His parents have also been married for more than 30 years and he has four siblings: two sisters and two brothers. He's the middle child.

What attracted me to him the most was his pin-sharp sense of humor, his sarcasm, his intellect, his kind heart and his love for life. (Oh, okay...maybe I don't mind the fact that he's hot, too.)

Stephen grew up Catholic and I grew up Baptist, but when we married, we wanted to find a denomination that blended the two faiths.  So, we converted to Methodist! Not saying this is the answer for everyone at all, but it worked really well for us personally.

Around here, I write about a mixture of things, primarily fashion and family. I love playing dress-up and usually do a styled outfit post each week featuring affordable, easy-to-recreate looks for the average gal.

My tagline for this blog has been "simply having more fun", and in my opinion, that's exactly what we do around here every day!

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Got another question? Feel free to email me at askblondeambition@gmail.com for more info!

Now it's your turn - link up or comment with your bio!

Family of Four

Warning: This is long. It is for my momma records since I treat this blog like a journal. If you're over all the baby stuff, (and I wouldn't blame you one single bit), I'd suggest maybe skipping over this one : ) 

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Did y'all wonder if I'd fallen off the face of the earth? ; ) Hope all of you are enjoying this holiday week with your friends and family!

So.

I had a baby girl on December 10th.

And, we are all slightly obsessed with her.

I know I'm biased. I know I am. But...but.

I think she's kind of perfect. (Aren't all babies?) She's so snuggly and warm and sweet-smelling. And I want to keep her this size forever and always.

Anywhoodle, I thought I'd pop in and give you all a little update on all the goings-on since Ainsley's birthday.

Her birthday...

People asked if we knew that December 10th we'd be having her. The answer? Nope! We had a bag packed just in case, and my parents came up earlier in the week because I just knew that week would be the week. (My body was o.v.e.r. being pregnant.)  However, we had no guarantee that Wednesday would be the day. So, it was a fun surprise for us, too!

That morning, I had my regular twice-weekly appointment, as well as my non-stress test. Ainsley hadn't been moving as much the night before -- something I immediately reported to my O.B.'s nurse when she was getting my vitals. After the non-stress test, which showed heavy contractions, Dr. D came in and checked me. If you've never been "checked", you truly haven't ever experienced fun ; )

After the 30 seconds of hell that is being "checked", he announced I had progressed significantly and he said Ainsley would likely have arrived within the next 48 hours anyway. Since this was a repeat C-section and I was considered a high-risk pregnancy, we decided to get her out that night at 5:00 p.m. So, Dr. D called Labor & Delivery and told them to admit us. And up to Floor 5 we went...

Birth story coming soon!

Baby

Ainsley is teeny tiny. At 5 lbs. 13 oz. and only 18 inches long, our little gal is quite the peanut! Funny thing is, even for a petite little thing, she lost the least amount of her birth weight out of all the babies in the nursery that week, only dropping two ounces upon discharge. Girlfriend loves to eat and I'm happy to report that she's thriving. Due to her eating so well, we only spent two nights in the hospital and were discharged! (That's a really short stay for a C-section.)

We have been seriously lucky to get two very laid back babes. Her disposition reminds me a lot of Caroline as a newborn. She cries when she's hungry or wet, (or just wants some cuddles), but honestly, she's pretty content most of the time.

She looks a whole lot like her big sister, too. Her eyes are the same shade of blue as Caroline's, but her skin is very olive-toned, much like her daddy's Italian side of the family. (Caroline definitely inherited my Scot-Irish skin tone and freckles.)

As of now, we are exclusively breastfeeding. I haven't pumped yet, as I really wanted her to get in the habit of latching and feeding easily. Maybe it's because this isn't our first go-round with BFing, but it has been SO much easier this time. I look forward to those quiet, still moments during the night feedings most of all. It's such a cool bonding experience that I loved being able to experience with Caroline and I'm glad that it's working out so far with Ainsley, too.

Big Sister

Caroline is curious about her little sister and definitely likes to watch us feed and bathe her. When people point to Ainsley and say, "Caroline, who is this?",  she'll reply, "Mah' bay-beeeee!" And then I melt because I'm sappy like that. #hormonesforlife

Because of the very small age difference, we haven't had to deal with any jealousy issues - probably the biggest perk I've heard of having them so close together.

I won't lie. The first two nights at home were ROUGH. Caroline woke every hour hollering, which then woke Ainsley, too. We just thought it was because of all the excitement, however, we discovered a couple days later that Caroline had an ear infection, which is why she was so restless. She's still getting over that, but thankfully, she's on the mend and everyone is sleeping better now.

It breaks my heart to not be able to pick her up because of my incision. She'll hang her little arms around my legs and cry, which kills me. Thankfully, I should be cleared today or tomorrow to be able to lift and carry her again.


Daddy

A very special thing happens when you have kids with someone you love. Despite the fact that you spend 23 of the 24 hours every day covered in the various bodily fluids of a tiny person, annnnd you may not have showered in a sweet forever, you fall even more in love with each other.

Maybe it's that whole, "We're in this together" mentality.

Stephen is a caretaker by nature, so he's been working double-time to make sure I'm comfortable for feeding sessions, that our pantry and fridge are stocked, that laundry is done....the guy has even made us home-cooked meals most nights.

He is also completely smitten with his daughters. (Duh.)

Something about seeing a grown man pull up a chair for a tea party or tell your newborn daughter that she's "the prettiest thing ever" that makes you weak in the knees. Men turn to mush around their little girls. This is fact. And I love it.


Mommy

I feel pretty good, actually! This C-section recovery has been much easier than the first, probably because my body knew what to expect this time. The day after the CS was horrendous -- hello, second day pain!! -- but after that, things started getting better. I tried to force myself to walk a lot in the hospital, which I credit for getting rid of the bulk of the soreness so quickly.

I only had to take the pain meds for the first five or six days after the surgery and now I'm just taking ibuprofen when needed for soreness.

I did have quite a bit (read: a shiz ton) of swelling in my feet and ankles...and thighs...and hips...and abdomen...following the surgery. It was super sexy and I've never felt more attractive. (Ever heard of pitting edema? A barrel of fun; that's what that is.) Seriously, Lebron James and I could've shared shoes.

It was super sexy and I've never felt more attractive.

(Fluid retention is the new black.)

This is really common after C-sections because of all the fluid they pump into you prior to being operated on. I'm now happy to report that I have noticeable ankles and knees again, though my tummy is still pretty swollen.

And I'm still totally, unapologetically wearing maternity jeans.


Life with two

Having two only 14 months apart is not for the faint of heart. Or those with low energy levels. I don't feel like I had much of a recovery period after the hospital. I just had to jump back into life and honestly, that was okay with me.

Is it tiring? Hell yes.

Do I love it anyway? You bet I do.

We are slowly getting our stride and I'm starting to feel like we're not treading water anymore. The first week was a blur, but this past week has been much smoother. My mom has driven up each week to be here on the days Stephen works, which has been so, so helpful. I'm definitely a little nervous about how I'll handle it once I'm here by myself, but I know that it'll all work out.

I wondered constantly how I'd love another child as much as Caroline. I can't put into words exactly how it feels, but it's like God makes even more room in your heart when you bring another child into the picture. I love them both so fiercely and wholly. They are our greatest accomplishments and the most precious gifts we have ever been given.

I don't care what else I achieve in this lifetime, so long as I do this mom thing right. Yes, Ainsley was a surprise to us, but sometimes the best things in life are those that you never saw coming.

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See y'all tomorrow!

Caroline's "Birth" Day: {A Birth Story}

Blogging has been a little sparse lately, but with good reason. See Exhibit A below.

Taken after her Dr. appt. on Friday. It wore Miss Priss out.

Our Caroline is a JOY. I don't know how we ended up with such a happy and easy baby, but I'm very thankful. I wanted to share a few sweet photos from Caroline's birthday, as well as a little recap of the day while all the details are fresh in my mind.

I don't want to forget any part of this babe's arrival and first days, so please bear with me for a few more baby-centric posts : ) Fashion and outfit posts will return soon enough. Pinky promise.

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Our Cesarean was scheduled for 5:30 a.m., so we woke up at 4:00 a.m. to shower, pack last minute items and get ready for our big day! We headed out the door at 5:20, as we live approximately two minutes from the hospital we used. It was so nice to have a quick drive!

The sunrise was GORGEOUS on the morning of Caroline's birth. We snapped this pic from our Labor & Delivery suite on the fifth floor of the hospital.

We arrived and were promptly taken to our room for the next three days in Labor & Delivery. I was so relieved that the two nurses on call that morning were both ladies I'd met during a previous visit. (Thank you to Joanna and Emily for making us feel so calm during the pre-op prep!)

This was our last photo as a family of two!

I got changed into my gorgeous hospital-issued gown (blech!) and they hooked me up to a contraction monitor. Soon thereafter, Joanna started my IV, I was given an antacid and they began to give me fluids and antibiotics for the surgery. 

Around 6:30 a.m., Caroline's "welcoming committee" arrived: my parents, Stephen's mom and his two sisters, Sarah and Stephanie. For the next few minutes, we talked and laughed and got "pumped up" for what was about to happen! I was SO happy to be sharing this special morning with the people we love.

Our doc, Dr. D., came in at 7:00 a.m. to go over last minute details and answer questions. He was super reassuring that everything would go smoothly, which made me feel so calm and collected. 

Next, the anesthesiology team came in to talk about their plan of action. Here's where things got a little complicated...

Because of some test results, they decided an epidural would be safer than a spinal. (I'm still not totally sure of the reasons, but I do know that it had something to do with my specific blood volume and the speed at which the spinal goes in versus the epidural.) We knew a spinal might be more effective, but we trusted that they would know best what to do for the safety of Caroline and me.

Now, y'all know that the spinal/epidural was the part I was dreading the most. I am happy to report that although it wasn't a cake walk, the epidural wasn't the most horrible thing. The worst part were the two numbing shots they gave me before putting in the actual epidural. Thankfully, they let Stephen stay in the room and hold my shoulders while they administered it! He was an excellent source of comfort during the whole thing.

This was me listening to one of the nurses describe the epidural process. My entire face says, "Um, they're going to do WHAT with that needle?!" Ha!

Stephen got suited up  in his "Breaking Bad" garb for his daddy debut!

After the epidural was started, my legs started to get warm and tingly, so to the O.R. we went!

They began to put more medication into the epidural once we got to the O.R., but quickly noticed that it was only taking effect on the right side of my body. They gave a little more and even tilted the operating table to spread the medication more effectively, but I still wasn't getting completely numb.

Unfortunately, they reached the maximum dosage on the medicine and I still wasn't numbing as completely as I needed to for a comfortable C-section. To ensure Caroline's safety and also that she would be alert upon delivery, they told me it would be best to make the first two incisions before putting me under. (General anesthesia makes it very important for the baby to be taken out really quickly to cut out the risk of any side effects it could potentially cause.)

I said a quick prayer in my head and tried to stay calm. Although I did feel the incisions a bit on the left side, it was so worth it to know that our girl would be alert and safe. 

The last thing I remember is the anesthesiologist telling me that everything would be okay and that they would get Caroline out within a matter of seconds after I went to sleep. 

Next thing I knew, I woke up in recovery and, less than an hour later, was getting ready to meet my girl! 

They wheeled me up to my room where Stephen was waiting with a HUGE smile on his face. At this point, no one had held Caroline yet because Stephen wanted me to be the first. (Thank you for that, honey!)

Moments later, a sweet team of nurses brought in our girl and I started bawling my eyes out. 

She. Was. Beautiful.

I was so overcome with emotion. Happy emotion. The kind that makes your heart feel like it could explode. 

I also appreciate the hospital staff for what happened next:

You see, the nurses wanted me to have a special bonding moment with Caroline, so they undressed her and I got to hold her skin-to-skin. It was incredible.

Next, since we knew we wanted Caroline to be exclusively breast fed, we wanted to give her the chance to latch naturally. If you are expecting, PLEASE do this. It was so, so neat to see her find her way to me, latch on and start nursing without any assistance. 

It was that moment more than anything that I'll never forget.

This is our first photo as a family of three!

The rest of the day was sort of a blur. Visitors and family came in and left, nurses were constantly in and out and we were exhausted. 

It was the best exhaustion I've ever experienced, though : )

Even though I hated having to be put under for the last minutes of her delivery, I definitely feel like we got to have that special first moment. I can honestly say that I don't feel robbed of anything. The amazing staff in Labor & Delivery made sure to help us feel like we were completely in charge and involved with Caroline's birth. It was an incredible experience and I'm so thankful that she got here safely.

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Stay tuned for another post on Caroline's homecoming and a nursery reveal, all happening this week!

Early Surprises of Mommyhood

I am positively loving being a mom to our sweet girl! Each day brings a whole new set of experiences, challenges, lessons and surprises, and I love that. For someone who lives by her planner, I've had to learn quickly to just take each day as it comes and savor each delicious moment of this new adventure.

Caroline is wearing her cupcake onesie and pink bow in honor of her daddy's birthday today! 

Here are a few things that have really surprised me thus far:

I adore breastfeeding. I honestly don't know why I was so intimidated by nursing because I'm telling y'all, it's the most incredible bonding experience. Sure, there are challenges that we're still working through, but I'm proud to say that I've stuck with it and it's starting to become easier each day. I've been very lucky that Stephen, my mom and my mom-in-law have all been such great cheerleaders for me. I would definitely encourage any soon-to-be mommas to give it a solid try. It's flat-out the neatest thing to be able to bond with your baby on that level.

Dirty diapers aren't as bad if they come from your own kiddo. I'll 'fess up. I have the weakest stomach imaginable and wondered if I'd be squeamish about certain things when Caroline arrived. I'm here to tell you that it's not nearly as icky as you might think. Pinky swear. You just do what you gotta do!

I have actually had time to shower and apply make-up. Yes, having a baby is a lot of work, especially a newborn. But, somehow, I've found time nearly each day to shower and put on a little foundation and lipstick. I've also found that it makes me feel better to take five minutes each day to freshen up. I think that's important for we mommas to do, don't you?

I'm shocked that my heart hasn't exploded. It's such a crazy thing; you fall in love with your kiddo when they're in the womb, but man, oh, man...it doesn't even compare to the first time you hold them in your arms. Each day, the love only grows, not only for Caroline, but also for Stephen.

What were some of your early surprises of being a mom? 

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I'm so excited to share TONS of photos and fun posts, including Caroline's birth story, a log I kept of our first days as parents and so much more. Keep an eye out for that in the coming days and weeks. So much to share!

And finally, I'd like to say "happy birthday" to my husband! He is definitely the better half of this relationship and my love for him has only grown in the past ten days as we've become parents. I cannot thank the good Lord enough for placing him in my life. 

Happy 29, honey!

Confessional Friday + 38 Week Bumpdate

Hey, friends! Welcome to Friday. Aren't we glad to see her?

So, my post today isn't a confession at all, but I did want to get this bumpdate up, just in case someone decides to grace us with her presence before next week! (And I'd be A-Okay with that at this point!)

You can leave links to your Confessional Posts per usual, of course!

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Weeks: 38 as of yesterday

Gender: GIRL! Stephen doesn't stand a chance against all of this estrogen : )

Name: Ainsley Catherine

Cravings: More space in my stomach so that I can eat food again without heartburn. Amen.

And nachos.

(No amount of heartburn can keep me away from nachos.)

Most looking forward to: Being not pregnant. I'm going to level with you here: the fun of this has run its course and I'm ready to feel like my body is mine again. After two years of being "with child", I honestly cannot remember what it feels like to not be pregnant. (I don't know how Michelle Duggar does it. And I do not wish to find out.)

I'm so very, very grateful that we've been given the gift of these two precious girls, and I have enjoyed both pregnancy journeys so much, each for their own reasons. Ainsley completes our family and I'm ready to have her on the outside!

Most nervous about: The C-section. Caroline's birth was a little bit scary with my epidural failing and all, so I'm praying that this time it takes. Because I can tell you first hand, a C-section without a complete epidural does not a fun experience make.

I've prayed about it a lot and now, I'm just giving it up to God.

Cheers to great drugs and a freaking fantastic anesthesiologist (!!)

I can't wait to: Start nursing a baby again. I was shocked out how much I enjoyed breastfeeding Caroline. It was such a cool bonding experience and I'm excited to share that with Ainsley, too.

Updates: We really and truly thought we were having her on my birthday. I joked with Stephen on Tuesday night that all I wanted for my birthday was to get this baby OUT. He kept saying, "Maybe Santa will give you a baby for your b-day!"

The next morning, after a night of contracting and contracting and contracting, I was eating my words. I was in pain and they were so much more intense than any of the contractions I had felt so far. These contractions started in my back and radiated all the way around to my tummy, then down into my thighs. They were the real-freaking-deal and they. sucked. big. time.

I had an appointment for a final ultrasound with our high-risk OB at 8:30 a.m. sharp, so I called ahead, told them how I was feeling and they met me there at 7:50 and got me right back before anyone else. (Thank you, Dr. C and staff!!)

They immediately began the ultrasound and I started contracting...hard. So intensely that our high-risk doc was convinced I was in labor and told me we should probably go home and get ready for the C-section! (Ainsley's head was so low that they couldn't get a measurement on it with the ultrasound...and trust me, I could/can feel it!) Even though they were intense, the contractions were all happening at really irregular intervals, (regularity = true labor), so we decided to go on home until my later appointment at 1:00 p.m.

I was feeling evvvvvvvery contraction, so I went home, packed a bag, put Ainsley's things in a bag and got my game face on.

(For concerned parties about Stephen and who packed his bag: our house is a literal two-minute drive from the hospital we're using, so Stephen will go back and forth when he needs things. And, should he require a bag, he is quite capable and willing to pack it himself ; ) I had SO many people ask me last year before Caroline's birth if I had "packed Stephen's bag yet" and we would both look at each other and laugh. {Y'all, I am serious. Granted, most of them were older/elderly women, but these folks honest-to-goodness wanted to know if and when I planned on packing his things for him.} He's a 30-year-old man who travels across the country for work on a weekly basis. I asked him if he felt cheated in some way if I let him pack his own bag for our hospital stay and he said, verbatim, "I haven't had a lady pack my bag since I went to camp when I was eight." So, there you have it.)

But back to my story...

I remember thinking, as we loaded our things into the car and headed to the appointment, that this could be it. The day the family of three became the family of four. And then The Little Drummer Boy came on the radio. And I thought about Christmas and Hallmark commercials. And puppies. And, of course, I started to get teary-eyed and happy and sappy. And then I was bawling, Bing Crosby blaring in the background and all.

Oh, hormones...

Anywhoodle, by the time we got to our 1:00 appointment with our regular O.B., the contractions were still happening, but the intensity had died down a lot. (This was a welcomed feeling because...OUCH.) After a while on the NST machine, a (super-duper fun) exam and a lot of discussion, we decided that we'd reconvene later this morning (as in today) at 8:00 a.m. and go from there.

So, who knows if we'll have a baby this afternoon, tonight, this weekend or next week...it'll be a surprise for all of us - Stephen and me, included!

   

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