8.23.2011

Things That Keep This Bride Up At Night

"It's like raaaaiiin on your wedding day..."
Ironic via Alanis Morisette

With the official wedding countdown at T-minus 26 days now, it’s fair to say I’m getting a little anxious. Not about the actual marriage AT ALL. In fact, S and I joked the other night about how much easier it would have been to have just gone down to the courthouse, haha! No, my worries are actually more about the detail-ish stuff; d├ęcor, cake, dress alterations, making wedding weight, etc.

I have the CRAZIEST dreams lately. Like, the other night, I awoke in a cold sweat after dreaming that it was the day of the wedding and the venue where our reception is being held called to tell us that their place had burned down the night before! Terrible.

I also dreamed that Stephen was actually from Italy (to be fair, he is of Italian descent) and the immigration peeps said his green card wasn’t legit. Therefore, we wouldn’t be able to get married. This is hilarious because, a) Stephen lived his entire life in Northwest Arkansas; b) He’s never even been out of the country.

Craziness, I tell you.

I’ve seen so many pictures on photography sites lately of beautiful brides. They are perfectly toned, fit and tanned. I look at myself in the mirror and see bloated and pale. What gives?

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been trying so hard to eat healthfully and hit the gym lately, but the stresses of wedding stuff have definitely led me to indulge a bit more than I probably should be lately.

Also thoughts like…

My teeth aren’t white enough.

Our invitations weren’t elaborate enough.

Should we be serving chicken instead of beef?

Oh my gosh, I forgot we still need to get a guest book!

I shouldn't have eaten that cupcake.

We still owe the church $250 to pay the clean-up crew!

Where will we come up with a spare $250 to pay the church to pay said cleaning crew?

Will people think it’s weird that I’m not walking down the aisle to the bridal march?

Should I have gotten the silk organza gown instead of the satin? (Even though I’ve had a long-standing love affair with satin.)

Why can't I drag myself off the couch to go to the gym?

Crap! I forgot to rent the aisle runner!

What if Aunt Flo pays a visit the day of the wedding? (My time of the month has a tendency to show up whenever it feels like it, despite my being on The Pill. TMI, I know.)

What if I’m so overcome with emotion that I can’t stop bawling long enough to say my vows? (This REALLY worries me.)

What if one of our guests brings their baby and it screams and cries during the ceremony?

(We’ve got several guests with bambinos and, though I’m sure our peeps would be considerate enough to take them out, I’ve been to weddings before where the parents just sit there and let them cry it out.

Mortifying.)

What if one of our wedding party members just doesn’t show up? (Again, ridiculous.)

I really hope we didn't forget to send an invite to someone we know well.

What if the sound system messes up?

What if the church catches on fire?

What if it rains?

What if my hair decides it doesn’t want to cooperate that day?

What if I grow a huge wart on the end of my nose spontaneously the night before?

What if someone actually objects during the “Does anyone have a reason why these two should not be married? Speak now or forever hold your peace” part?

Do wedding officiants even read the “Does anyone have a reason why these two should not be married? Speak now or forever hold your peace” part anymore??

What if I accidentally lock my knees at the altar and pass out?

……………………………………………..

And so on and so forth. Really, it’s all consuming, y’all.

I’m trying to remember to live in the moment and savor each minute of this pre-wedding stuff. After it’s over, I know I’ll look back on all of this and laugh about how flipping worried I was during the weeks before.

I know that our guests will leave the reception with full tummies, whether it’s chicken or beef.

I know that our church has a great sprinkler system, just in case it does happen to erupt in flames.

I know that if I start to cry, Stephen will make me laugh and, therefore, I’ll be able to repeat my vows sans sobbing.

I know that my hairdresser and Redken Forceful 23 hairspray will make sure that my mess of hair cooperates.

Most importantly, I know that come hell or high water, I will marry Stephen on September 17th, 2011.


...and speaking of high water, does anyone know if Arkansas has ever experienced an immobilizing flood during the month of September before?

Be blessed, lovelies-

40 comments:

  1. This is too funny, because I started to write a very similar post yesterday with the same title, and I got a little sidetracke and didn't finish it!

    We're getting married the week after you, so I understand the crazy thoughts that go through a bride's head. I just keep telling myself that at the end of the day, we'll be married! Hope you get some sleep!

    Shay

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  2. Girl, and even if any of this stuff happened.... the most important thing is the "I DO" and your name at the end of the day!!! I know your day is going to be just PERFECT!!!!

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  3. Everyone has those thoughts! I just reminded myself that at the end of the day, I would be married and THAT was the most important thing! And one year later (August 27, this Saturday!) we're happier than we've ever been!!

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  4. First it is your day do what makes you happy. Second it still comes down to just saying I DO! This is such an important day and you want everything to be perfect but what matters is all the days after that day. Take a deep breath and enjoy you will look beautiful and everything will be wonderful!

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  5. Oh Leslie I felt the exact same way before I got married! And the reality is that something will go wrong...but most likely you won't even know about it or care! You are right...in the end you'll be married and that is all that matters. And you will be a beautiful bride!

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  6. Haha I had so many of the same thoughts as you. I was mostly worried about a hurricane randomly popping up the day of our wedding. You have to relax though. It will all work out and you will look beautiful! You just have to remember what this day is really all about.

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  7. Girl, you crack me up :).

    The month before our wedding I gave myself migraines because I was stressing out so bad...I never had them before and I haven't had them since. On our wedding day my bridesmaids kept me in line, we are good enough friends that they told me to that I was being rediculous when I was freaking out that the "A" and "B" (our initials) weren't space correctly on the chapel doors. I realized then that if my friends didn't think it was a big deal then it probably wasn't.

    Just remember to enjoy these last days because you will never have these moments again! (Easier said than done, believe me :).

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  8. I totally did the same thing! Afterwards I was mad at myself for worrying so much instead of focusing on enjoying myself. Things will go wrong, that's life and anytime you put that much time into every detail something is bound to not work out the way you planned. But you get to walk away married to your soul mate and that is all that really matters :) Congrats!

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  9. I'm sure it will be a perfect day! At the end of the day, even if something does go wrong, you'll be married!

    I'm currently planning my own wedding and its still months away and I already worry about those things. I think its important to remember that this is your day and that you get to marry the love of your life. Everything else will work itself out!

    How exciting that your day is almost here! xoxo

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  10. It will be a beautiful day just do your best to try to relax and take it all in!

    I was sooo nervous that I was going to be so emotional I wouldn't be able to say my vows but you know what, I totally surprised myself and was smiling so big through them...no tears whatsoever!

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  11. great post!! you make me laugh! good luck! I know the wedding will be beautiful and I can't wait to see pictures of your big day! I'll be praying for you that day & congrats! :)

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  12. Oh Lord!
    1. I walked down the aisle to Amazing Grace. Make that part your own. Who cares what everyone else thinks!
    2. The only people who would object are the nut jobs that you didn't invite.
    3. Our reception room got moved the DAY OF the wedding. An entirely different building. An entirely unknown room to either of us. It worked out wonderfully.

    Just go with it! You will be married to your best friend after all of it. None of that other stuff matters!!

    Oh yeah, and rain, we heard "it makes the knot tighter"!

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  13. You're too funny. I've never been married but I've heard that day goes by in such a blur that if anything did go wrong it won't matter and you won't care. Enjoy!

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  14. I walked down the aisle to Fanfare for the Common Man by Aaron Copeland. One of my all time favorite songs and I don't regret it for a moment.

    Also, this is totally cliche and I'm sure you've heard it a thousand times, but your wedding day will be a blur. A problem or two will arise and you'll work through them and later you're look back and laugh. Potential problem or two aside, it will still be the best day of your life.

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  15. This gave me a nice mid-day laugh. :) I felt the exact same way before I got married! I kept having dreams where I couldn't make it down the aisle or the food didn't show up etc. I promise everything will work out and your day will be FABULOUS! My preacher that married us had the same name as an ex-boyfriend, so I was terrified that I would be so nervous that I would say the preacher's name instead of hubby and everyone would think I was thinking of my ex! Thankfully I was just being crazy and there were no Ross and Rachel moments. :)

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  16. OMG! I am right there with you! I'm at 38 days, and it's taking over my life. It's all I think about. "Did I remember this?" "How are we paying for that?" "will my vision come together and be beautiful?" Seriously! LOL Keep on trucking though... you're almost there!

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  17. haha.. You crack me up! Your day will be perfect, but I'm a worrier.. er.. preparer too so I could totally see where you're coming from. My friend just got married and everyone kept asking her if she was on something b/c she was so calm. :) It's like once the day arrived, she just exhaled and went with it...and it was amazing. I am confident your day will be the best day ever. And besides, an immobilizing flood would just mean you could have people arriving in boats. Kinda cool. Just saying. ;) I tease I tease. Hugs to the best bride I know!

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  18. it would be all too easy for me to say to not worry about it but i know how you feel. I've been through it and had A LOT of the same thoughts...especially the crying part and the rain whole dilemma. You just have to come to terms with the fact that whether it's raining cats and dogs or there's not a cloud in the sky...it's completely out of your control. Don't drive yourself crazy over it. Just enjoy it all and don't let anything ruin your day...NOTHING! :)

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  19. All of your thoughts/fears are completely normal!! As a wedding planner, I am going to play devil's advocate, though, and say that nothing is EVER perfect. If little things go wrong, you are really the only one who will notice because as far as your guests know, it was supposed to be that way. And it is those little things that go wrong, which will make your wedding story something to talk about in the future.

    WM

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  20. All worries aside, YOU ARE GOING TO DO GREAT! I couldn't be happy for you guys girly!

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  21. "What if I’m so overcome with emotion that I can’t stop bawling long enough to say my vows? (This REALLY worries me." HA this happened to me. I was in the moment though so I just paused and waited til I could speak and then went on. It wasn't the end of the world. Stuff will go wrong. It's inevitable, but at the end of the day like you said ou will marry your man and that's what matters most.

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  22. I constantly have a million things running through my head too... and I'm not even planning a wedding! I can't even imagine the little amount of sleep I will get the day I start my planning.

    No worries... everything will be perfect! And you will be so happy that little things won't even bother you!

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  23. Your wedding day none of that stuff will matter, all you need is you, him, a pastor, and the good Lord:) Have fun, every little thing is going to be alright!!

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  24. It will be absolutely wonderful! And you will have so much fun and you will marry the man you love...and yes, your teeth will be white enough. :) Enjoy these next few weeks!

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  25. new follower :) love your sweet blog! your wedding is going to be perfection no matter what may come up!

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  26. It's actually considered by many to be bad luck to use the wedding march. It's from an opera by Wagner...the marriage is never consummated and the husband is forced to leave his bride. It's a long long story, but I hope that makes you feel better about your music choice!

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  27. This list made me laugh! I understand your concerns, but just remember - at the end of the day you will be Mrs., and that is what matters!

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  28. No worries! God has a perfect plan! Whatever happens, (hopefully no fires), its all going to be wonderful! :)

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  29. What an exciting time for you! I can't wait until I am that close to my wedding day, but I have a year to go! :) I am sure you are going to look beautiful! All the best with the final few days!!!

    Liesl :)

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  30. Oh my dear, you need a drink! I was THAT bride who bawled during the vows and could.not.get.them.out. And I did not walk to the bridal march (it's a no-no in the Catholic church - at least ours)It will be okay. If you want to cry....cry. If you want to walk to Cannon D instead of the bridal march....do it. If you want to skip the gym...skip it and head out for a girl night with your bridesmaids (who WILL show up!)

    Your day only comes once so relax and enjoy!

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  31. As a musician who plays tons of weddings, THANK YOU for not walking down to the bridal march. I so much more enjoy the weddings where people like to personalize the music a bit more. Congrats!!

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  32. aw!!! No worries, it will be beautiful I'm sure, and I'm almost 100% positive that the place won't burn down and your fiance won't have green card issues, haha. BTW, before my wedding I called my gyno and they told me how to force aunt flo to visit early by rearranging your pills. Just FYI, it's possible!! ; )

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  33. Oh bless you - all sounds perfectly natural to me! And a good bit of sobbing in the vows is always allowed - always starts me blubbing too!

    Cxx

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  34. Girl, you are too funny. I bet everything will work out and be ok!!!

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  35. Okay, my blood pressure just went through the roof! Haha! It'll be great and at the end of the day, you're right, the most important thing is that you'll be married!

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  36. I got married in April in Arizona (i.e. the desert). I had planned an outdoor ceremony and sit-down dinner. On the day of the wedding it was 35 degrees and storming. We had to move everything inside and 50% of my planning went out the window. I knew I could do one of two things (1)get upset and ruin our special day or (2) smile, laugh at the irony of rain in the desert and focus on the real meaning on our wedding. I chose to do option (2) and we had a fabulous wedding day. :-)

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  37. Everyone is correct, try not to think about the what-ifs and instead think about the what-wills. :) On my wedding day, the music wouldn't play for me to walk down the aisle so everyone literally hummed the bridal march; my bouquets were all FROZEN; the company I hired to cater my reception and do cake service, packed up and left before said cake service (they did come back); and my new husband and I were nearly hit by a drunk driver that evening! That being said, the only thing that still upsets me to this day about my wedding is that I didn't take the time to have as much fun as I should have. :)

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  38. Girl - I have read your blog long enough that no matter what stumbles in your way - "you GOT THIS"! Relax and let Go and Let GOD! Blessings!

    PS my word verification is "sudly"! I home your big day isn't filled with suds! HAHA - totally being a corndog!

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  39. HIGH FIVE - I am not walking down the isle to the bridal march either. You'll have to share your details after the big day [I won't reveal mine until then either]. I've had a ton of worries that are a bit strange but yours make me feel 100% better about all of mine... even though mine are just as worry some and out there. YOU'LL DO AWESOME!

    My fear is my teeth as well - that and I can't find shoes I love, and I haven't bought undergarments and well... I still need a something borrowed but I can't just ASK for that, can I? Aren't people supposed to offer that up?

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  40. I feel the same way! I am way more than a month away, but I freak constantly about weird stuff. It is insane. I feel if it is not one thing it is another.

    I actually had the SAME thought about my dress. ahhh. So many things going on.

    Seriously about everything you have mentioned I have been thinking the same thing.

    I hope you get a chance to enjoy your last few weeks as a single woman! Just remember everything will turn out perfect! If anything goes wrong my friends mom says to say, "oh well" and keep a smile. In the end you and your hubby will have a fabulous day! <3 XOXO

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